HOW TO SAY NO TO AN MLM PITCH: INTRODUCTION
So, your friend or family member has contacted you with their newest MLM pitch. Yes, it can be really annoying. However, if you’ve been reading my anti MLM posts on this blog, multi level marketing goes way deeper than just the annoying cold message. There are plenty of different ways and times that someone will send you an MLM pitch. In today’s post we will go over those different ways and times you’ll get pitched in addition to how to say no to the MLM pitch.
Related: How MLM companies ruin friendships and relationships.
DIFFERENT WAYS YOU’LL FIND YOURSELF IN AN MLM PITCH CONVERSATION
There are plenty of different ways you’ll have an MLM pitch in your DMs or during lunch with your friend. You might even get invited to an online party for Facebook. If the rep is somewhat old school, they may still do in person parties as well. You might get the typical cold message, or the rep may be a little more creative than that. Just as an fyi, there are many more ways to add to the below lists. As multi level marketing evolves throughout the world of social media, their tactics and ways that they pitch will evolve as well.
COLD MESSAGE
This is the veteran MLM pitch as I like to call it. It’s probably the most common way that you’ll get contacted by an MLM rep. This is usually going to happen in your DM’s, text messages, or maybe even email depending on how they prefer to contact you. There are buzz words and ways to know if this cold message has something to do with an MLM pitch and I went over that in this post.
TAKES YOU OUT TO LUNCH OR COFFEE TO “CATCH UP”
Have you ever received a message from an old friend or acquaintance talking about catching up? I would like to hope that for the majority of the time it is to catch up. However, there are instances where it’s just to pitch you their newest “amazing business opportunity.”
BEFRIENDS YOU FIRST
This is a topic that’s been spoken about on this blog, but what some reps like to do is befriend you first. They fake a friendship to try and seem more authentic. There was a rep that I reacted to (click here to watch the video) that talked about how this was her way of pitching. It’s sad because I’ve spoken to people who have actually fallen for this pitch. The reps try to make it seem like this is authentic, when it’s all a lie. The sisterhood that they use in their MLM pitch is part of the facade. It’s very rare to hear of uplines and downlines staying friends once they leave the MLM.
UNCONVENTIONAL WAYS TO PITCH
Some unconventional ways to pitch have been shared in MLM horror stories on Youtube, or even the anti MLM reddit. I’ve seen people having an MLM pitch pop up during a date, or after meeting someone at the bar. There was one story, and I believe it was shared in the anti MLM reddit of a man who brought a woman back to his apartment after meeting her at the bar and she started pitching her MLM to him. Another way that’s pretty sneaky, is Mary Kay reps will have a giveaway at bridal shops for a free makeup consultation. They never mention the name Mary Kay, and spoiler, it’s not a giveaway. The reps will contact everyone that leaves their information. While this may seem harmless, the consultation is just a way to pitch the MLM whether that be to purchase products, or join.
Related: Why MLMs are predatory and how they target people at their most vulnerable.
TIMING IS EVERYTHING
Most of the time, MLM reps will pitch anyone with a pulse if they want to make money, but when you’ll be pitched is a little more manipulative than you think. I would possibly say it’s more calculated, but it’s not always calculated, it sometimes happens by luck. Sadly, when MLM reps (at least a majority of the time) state that they just want to help people, it’s motivated by being able to build their team.
AFTER YOU’VE HAD A BABY
This is something that I’m expecting to deal with come October once the bebe is born. Unfortunately, as soon as you have a baby, you may see an influx in DMs from MLM reps. This is due to a few reasons. The first is so that you can lose the baby weight if the MLM pitch is for a health and wellness MLM. Another reason might be because they want to have you join their team so that you can stay home with your child and so that you feel like you’re contributing to the family. I hate when they use the pitch of contributing to the family because being a stay at home parent is contributing more than enough to the family. This tactic just screams mom shaming. As a new parent, you may be craving adult interaction, so the pitch may be geared towards the community or sisterhood.
IF YOU OPEN UP ABOUT A CHRONIC ILLNESS
It breaks my heart that people with chronic illnesses would be a target for an MLM pitch, but it happens on an every day basis. I know of someone who was a serial MLMer (someone who’s joined numerous MLMs), and they were targeted for their medical issues. They have IBS in addition, they are very open about their endometriosis and infertility. Said person was targeted for many health and wellness MLMs especially because of this. There is a Plexus rep that I reacted to over a year ago (click here, but please excuse the quality) who mentions all of her chronic illnesses. She credits Plexus in helping her get better and get off pharmaceutical medications.
WHEN YOU TALK ABOUT YOUR JOB
If you ever talk about losing your job or how much you hate your job, expect an MLM pitch in your DMs. MLM reps will try to tell you about this business opportunity that they have that can benefit you. You can be your own boss, work from your phone, and you don’t have to answer to a manager at your 9-5. However, you aren’t your own boss, nor are you a small business owner. In addition, you to still have people to answer to, such as your upline, and the MLM company itself. You have to follow the rules at the MLM company, so you don’t have the freedom to do whatever you want with your “biz.”
THE PANDEMIC
I wrote an entire anti MLM Monday post about this last year at the beginning of the pandemic. In all of my time working for an MLM and being anti MLM, I’ve never seen such manipulative tactics to get people to join. There was a massive rise in recruiting in MLMs. The FTC did step in and send warning letters to companies for medical and income claims. Since we are still experiencing the pandemic, MLM reps will still use this to their advantage.
IF YOU’VE EXPRESSED PRETTY MUCH ANYTHING NEGATIVE IN YOUR LIFE
If you ever express anything negative in your life, expect an MLM pitch. MLM reps are trained to use anything possible to twist it into a pitch. The MLM “why” is something that MLM reps always speak about. Their why usually has a sob story or a rags to riches story associated with it. This is to seem more relatable and show others that “you can do this too!” Because of this, the MLM reps know how to spin anything into an MLM pitch. And if they don’t, their upline does.
Related: Why it’s important to learn about the BITE Model with MLMs.
HOW TO SAY NO
Now that you have a little bit of background, how do you actually say no to an MLM pitch? It can be tricky, and the following ways to say no are on a case by case basis. You have to feel out the situation, the person, and it may also depend on how you’re feeling that day. There are times where I’ll just leave a rep on read, or I’ll respond. If you remember my post about how an MLM rep targeted me because of my hair thinning, it took me sleeping on it to decide how I wanted to respond to her. It really all depends.
NO IS A COMPLETE SENTENCE
This is something I talk about on my Youtube channel a lot. No means no and no is a complete sentence. Don’t ever feel like you owe the rep an explanation. They may be persistent and continue to message you, but saying No is good enough. For companies that are all about women empowerment and lifting women up, they sure are problematic in saying “no doesn’t mean no, it means not right now.” That’s why these reps are so persistent because most of the time that is drilled into them during their trainings.
EDUCATE THE PERSON (THIS IS ON A CASE BY CASE BASIS)
Educating a rep on the harms of MLM companies or explaining why you’re anti MLM is truly on a case by case basis. Some MLM reps are so heavily indoctrinated into the MLM that they will immediately go into defense mode. They’ll start with the narrative of pyramid schemes are illegal so it can’t be a pyramid scheme, or how they ARE helping people. These reps won’t see that you’re just trying to help them get out. That’s why when it comes to educating, you have to feel out the situation yourself.
BEING AGGRESSIVE IN YOUR RESPONSE MIGHT NOT ALWAYS BE THE ANSWER
I am well aware that some people just give out tough love and there are people who respond well to tough love. However, when you are indoctrinated, it may be a little harder to get through to someone this way. I don’t usually use the aggressive approach, because that’s just not my cup of tea. I’ll always recommend to start off with being kind. It does get annoying and sometimes you can’t help but get frustrated, trust me, I get it.
Try your best to keep things civil, because these reps will use defense mechanisms when they feel they are being attacked. They will also go back to their MLM team and be love bombed, so they’ll think their team is better than you. These reps may even tell their uplines, and their uplines will try to tell them to cut out the negativity. “Positive vibes only!” This is why toxic positivity runs rampant within MLM companies.
ON THE OTHER HAND, TOUGH LOVE MAY BE THE ANSWER
As I stated earlier, some of these points are on a case by case basis. In some situations tough love might be the way to handle it. If it’s a loved one or close friend, maybe they respond better when you don’t tip toe around a subject. Youtube is filled with anti MLM content and everyone’s approach differs. Some are more like myself, whereas others use the tough love approach. The audience and people we’ve all helped leave MLMs respond differently to all of us.
REMOVE YOURSELF FROM THE SITUATION
Sometimes your best bet is to remove yourself from the situation. It only gets more frustrating and awkward as the MLM pitch persists. It’s not worth your mental health and time. The only way you can maybe help yourself feel better is that whatever time the rep spent on you is less time spent on someone who might fall for it.
LEAVE THEM ON READ/BLOCK THEM
I’ve done this a few times. It usually depends on the situation and how I’m feeling that day. A lot of times I’ll do this because I’m so aggravated and I don’t want to yell at them. Other times, I just don’t have the energy or mental capacity for it. Usually, I don’t block people, however, there is one rep I blocked. She requested to be my friend on Facebook and she’s been a Younique rep for quite some time. She would message me about the opportunity and even messaged me every year on my birthday offering me a 10% discount as a birthday gift. I finally had enough and unfriended her then blocked her. It didn’t matter how many times I told her I wasn’t interested, she kept coming back. She’s definitely a lost cause.
Related: I was targeted by a Monat rep for my hair thinning. Here’s how I responded.
MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR
I’m sure most people will get at least one MLM pitch at some point in their life. Maybe this post can be a resource for you or someone in your life. Hopefully it was helpful and if you have anything to add (because I can keep going with this topic) leave it in the comments below. Feel free to reach out to me if you ever have questions on how to approach a situation like an MLM pitch. I’m always happy to help.
Related: How to spot an MLM from a mile away.
Disclaimer: This is all based on my opinion and research I have done. Please do your own research and fact checking. Section 107 of the Copyright Act provides the statutory framework for determining whether something is a fair use and identifies certain types of uses—such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research—as examples of activities that may qualify as fair use. Second Disclaimer: Anything said in this post is for entertainment purposes, and my opinions.
Great resources to further your research and education:
Jon M Taylor’s (MBA, PhD) Study: The Case for and against Multi Level Marketing
AARP’s Study of Multi Level Marketing: Profiling Participants and their Experiences in Direct Sales
Steven Hassan’s BITE Model
FTC’s article of a Pyramid Scheme vs MLM
The rest of my anti MLM Mondays posts can be found by clicking this link.
My Anti MLM Educational & Commentary content on Youtube.
