Aren’t you embarrassed? & a Linkup

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I came across this one Instagram post several days ago. It was actually circulating through the anti mlm (multi level marketing) sphere on social media. It was an MLM rep who had written the following caption:

Isn’t it embarrassing?!

Aren’t you embarrassed that you can’t put on a swimsuit and confidently walk around without a cover up on?? I know I fucking was. Ashamed and embarrassed. Didn’t want anybody to see me like that. HELL, I didn’t want to see me like that!! Made me fucking sick

I don’t give a fuck what anyone says about appearance and weight and how it’s not important. Your body is a reflection of your habits. Your body is at the mercy of your mindset. Nobody, NOBODY accepts low frequency, volatile, evil people around them. But yet trashing the body is ok?! Like, oh it’s ok to be obese, but please be spiritual and a good person.

What the fuck?! Mind, BODY, spirit bitch!

Being fat and obese is NOT ok. And I know you know it. I know you FEEL it. Your children fucking see it and so does your partner. Stop being embarrassed and stop being an embarrassment to yourself and those you love. Don’t accept obesity because society says we should. They don’t want us to be warriors. They want us to fall.

Be a FUCKING WARRIOR!!! I am here to help! I’m building warriors out of everyone around me!! You’re not going to beat me. So join me

I love you.

I’m not going to lie to y’all, when I read that I got a little upset. It’s been incredibly hard getting used to my postpartum body. In the beginning I did feel very embarrassed. There are days where I still feel embarrassed. Some days I look in the mirror and cry. But then there are days where I look in the mirror and see a body that grew and birthed our beautiful baby. Those are the days where I feel proud of myself. 

Some people might think I’m fatphobic for this next sentence, but this stems from my body dysmorphia and many years of binging and purging. I was always terrified of being fat and I always looked at myself and thought I was fat. Technically by my bmi I am considered obese at this moment in time. However, I do work out daily and I do eat better than I used to. I could eat a little healthier but I’m doing my best. 

My husband has been an absolutely amazing human being knowing that I am still struggling to love my body. Like I’ve said many times, I have good and bad days. To read this rep’s post and the portion about being an embarrassment to your partner and child cut through me really hard. My husband has been honest with me because it’s hard to lie about this being the biggest size I’ve been besides pregnancy. But he doesn’t love me any less. He calls me beautiful every day. The thing that I really love is when he calls me a good mom. 

This type of post would be considered tough love by some, but when you’re in a pretty fragile state like myself, it only makes things worse. Reading this didn’t motivate me at all. Maybe it motivated others but being considered embarrassing and an embarrassment to my family isn’t going to make me want to sign up with this person. It’s going to deter me, however I’m not her target audience. This rep also said your body is a reflection of your habits, but she only spoke about obesity. What about people who are dying due to anorexia for example? Are you only going to say obese people are unhealthy and forget about the thinner people who might be in worse shape? What about some fit people? Not every person who is fit on the outside is also fit in the inside. Those fitness competitions are no joke and the amount of restriction that goes on is also unhealthy. 

Oh and one more thing. I am a fucking warrior. There has been A LOT that has happened in my life along with going through a lot. I’ve overcome eating disorders. I didn’t let my epilepsy diagnosis stop me from continuing with my life even though there was one time that I attempted suicide and survived. This “embarrassing” body carried and birthed an entire human. My body is still healing and recovering because unlike some people, I haven’t had an easy postpartum journey. I am a warrior to be reckoned with. This rep doesn’t know me and probably never will but if she ever comes across this post, you don’t have to be fit and generally attractive to be a warrior.